Ok, sometimes I worry about my motherly instincts. I can think some pretty harsh things about my kids, and yet, I know that’s just one extreme end of the pendulum because I love them that much in the opposite direction.
It has been 17 days (I dig countdowns) since I last saw my daughter when I dropped her off at college several hundred miles away. At first it was all no lunch prep, no form filling out, no weekly football games where she played in the band and was drum major her senior year. Ah…I didn’t even know the high school had their first football game last Saturday. There were pints of gelato for dinner, movies right after work. Girls night could have been any night, but usually wasn’t.
Now I miss her!! She did a lot of dancing and singing and dinosaur imitating in the morning. She told me lots of things and didn’t seem to stop like a lot of teenagers. I know things about her I (almost) wish I didn’t.
People keep pitying me. “How’s the empty nest?” “Are you lonely?” Inside my head I was like, “Fuck no! Do you know how long I’ve waited to not have anyone to take care of?!”
Yesterday I got out the academic calendar — Fall Break in a month, Thanksgiving week, Christmas Break. That quirky little fun factory better come back to me for those!
And my son is 24 today. I miss him too!
Putting on my big girl, empty nest panties and moving on