I am fat. I am happy. Am I fat and happy?

I am fat. I just spent about 20 minutes trying on clothes that I don’t look too stuffed into.  (I didn’t succeed; I just have to go to work).


I am happy.  My x doesn’t bother me with niggling questions anymore and I like the person I’m dating a lot.

I am not fat and happy, however.  I hate clothes that don’t fit.  I hate looking in the mirror at clothes that used to fit my body and now hug it like a lumpy sausage.

Fact is, I’m not self destructing anymore.  I have an appetite.  Dating people eat and drink together.  There was a time when I thought I would just subsist on gin until I eventually died, and that was as an acceptable way to go as any, I thought.

So, I am grateful I’m not in that place anymore.  I need to work on portion control so getting dressed is a pleasure again.  And, I am happy, and I need to keep that going as long as I possibly can.

Moving on


2 thoughts on “I am fat. I am happy. Am I fat and happy?

  1. That’s not a picture of me, if that’s what you mean, but thank you! I just plucked that woman from the interweb. It’s a feeling (and a reality), but more of a “feeling fat.” I know I can change the feeling so I will get to work on that!

    Liked by 1 person

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