A Gift of Decompartmentalizing

My life has been very compartmentalized.

Growing up it was all Jesus, all the time.  It helped that the two most popular boys in my school, twins, attended my church.

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College and beyond was all experimentation.  Although I felt lost sometimes, I’d like to get more of the feel of that time back.  That me was confident and open.  I tried many things — good and bad.

Then I met “-”

It was all his way.  His part of the world.  His family.  All.  The.  Time.

He wasn’t so rigid at first, but eventually stopped making the trip to see my parents.  In fact, he decided not to attend my parents’ 50th? wedding anniversary.  I went with the kids.  I was so brainwashed by that time, I didn’t even think of making a fuss about it, or being ashamed about it.

That would NOT have gone over for his parents.

Much later, in a kitchen sink argument, I told him I held it against him that he didn’t go and show respect for my parents, and he replied that I was right, and I should have MADE him go.

Christ.

So, now that I’m separated, and just visited my mom and sister, both uncles and an aunt, a cousin, and two dear old friends, I’m still basking in the decompartmentalized life I have begun.  I don’t want to live in my “home” state, but I wish they were closer to each other.

It feels good to not have to forsake one part of my life for another.

Thank you? … Asshole…??

You gave me something you certainly wouldn’t intend to give me, but that I really cherish, and will continue to cherish.  Without you.

Moving on

 

 

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