Just breathe


I forgot about the time difference.  It’s one hour earlier there, and she’s fine.

At least, fine in the sense that they got everything they wanted, except one spot they will have to investigate further, and she’s eating Jell-o and talking to her family.

Not fine in the sense that she just had major surgery, and the pain will start to creep in, and she’s still got f-ing cancer.

I don’t want her to suffer, but I don’t want that to mean that she leaves me too soon.

Selfish.  I know.

I’m trying to take deep breaths. This is not (mainly) about me.

I’m into Anna Nalick’s song “Breathe (2 AM)” for lots of reasons.

One of them is for the opportunity to sing along with her about remembering to breathe.

Some of the other lyrics I’m thinking about now are:
“If I get it all down on paper it’s no longer inside of me threatening the life it belongs to.  And I feel like I’m naked in front of the crowd cause these words are my diary screaming out loud and I know that you’ll use them however you want to.”

OK.  Full moon be gone.  Friday the 13th be gone.  Cancer be gone.  And it was said, and it was so.



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