I’m very busy being happy, however, this happened:
My x “-” is going to my daughter’s parents’ weekend at college this weekend. Even though he asked my daughter, and she said, “No, please don’t,” he is bringing his girlfriend along. Last night I asked my daughter how that happened and I got a crisp, “I’m not going to discuss this with you.”
Hmmm. Straight from the therapist’s mouth? Or her dad’s? Or her own?
What a selfish prick her dad is. He also said he wanted to see a women’s hockey game because her college is known for it. She said she doesn’t know anyone on the team and it’s, you know, a sport! (Theater, singing, band. Those are her things.) They’re going anyway.
I got that overwhelming mama bear feeling. But, she’s too interested in pleasing her daddy to put her foot down about anything, and he’s too much of an asshole to not ask her to do things for his own selfish satisfaction. Also, it’s a see? Everything is fine. I live my life, visit my daughter on parents’ weekend as I usually would, and the new woman I love is okay with it, my daughter’s okay with it, my son and ex-wife will come around. Everyone’s ok. You’ll all see. It’s all legit.
And, what’s wrong with the girlfriend? She’s got three school-aged kids of her own. Where’s her judgment? Is she going to bribe my daughter to like her with a lollipop? Does she have her own daddy issues? Does she think she’s pleasing “-” by going to his daughter’s parents weekend? SHE’S NOT HER PARENT. Maybe she has a need for things to be legit, too.
So…what happened is…I spent the evening trying to get it out of my head…nothing I can do…they’re both adults (dad and daughter)…they have a relationship I’m not a part of (although SHE was venting to ME about “-” bringing his 38-year-old subordinate at work turned girlfriend)…I have a new relationship that I’m thrilled with…move on, me!
And then, I spent the night participating in nightmares, and right before I woke up, I cut “-‘s” face with a knife. Yes. I did. That’s how I really feel about all his stupid shit.
Since the sun is shining again, I’m back to trying to live in the present, not trying to micromanage people who say they don’t want to be micromanaged but then call their mothers for sympathy, and getting on with my own life.
I hope tonight in my dreams I don’t actually kill him. That would be a messy situation. For me. Take that you arrogant narcissist. She sees you. We all see you. You’re not legit.