You can’t be part of my life like that anymore. We are not together anymore.


You don’t have to communicate to me every time you are reminded of me by 1) seeing a Karmann Ghia, my favorite car, and texting me a picture, 2) attending a thing in Washington, DC, where one of my favorite journalists/talking heads, Chuck Todd, is speaking, and texting me a picture, 3) telling me that you’re glad to see my sense of humor back when I spit at you that, in your new relationship, you realize he’s the girl and she’s the guy.

It’s a manifestation of how you have no boundaries.  How you want to reach out to all sides all the time — to the old woman and the new woman, the old son and the new son, the old daughter and the new daughters, the old friends and the new friends…no, wait a minute, there are no new friends for you…but you just keep hoping everyone’s ok with what you did.  Are we all good?  All good?

When this first happened, and I texted you about something I needed an answer on, for instance, the TV not working, and you didn’t get back to me in a reasonable time frame, and I then texted, Is she there?  Are you fucking her?  And you asked me if you could talk to me a minute and you asked if this is how it’s going to be now…if he doesn’t get back to me immediately I ask him if he’s fucking her.  I didn’t know what I was going to say, but I said, I don’t know.  Maybe.  And you said, You can’t be part of my life like that anymore.  We are not together anymore.

Well, this is sort of like that.  You can’t be a part of my life like that anymore.  We are not together anymore.

If you are reminded of me by something in your new life, I don’t care to know.  You don’t have to keep me in the loop by text me.

In choosing your new life you, have forfeited everything from the old life — sharing memories of what I like, enjoyment of my humor, entitlement to my whereabouts, hopes and dreams and plans, and ALL cross pollination — except logistical conversations about detangling our financial lives and decisions about our children.

Moving on.